Imagine this: You’re scrolling through life, doing your thing, when you hear about someone engaging in self-harm. You pause. It’s a heavy topic, one that people often tiptoe around. But what if we talk about it in a way that makes sense? No medical jargon, no distant textbook explanations—just a real, clear-eyed understanding of what’s happening.
So, what exactly is Non-Suicidal Self-Injury (NSSI)?
It’s when a person deliberately harms themselves—not because they want to end their life, but as a way to deal with something overwhelming inside them. The most common methods? Cutting, burning, scratching, hitting… It’s not about seeking attention or being “dramatic” (a harmful stereotype, by the way). It’s often a desperate attempt to manage emotions that feel unbearable. Think of it like an unhealthy pressure valve—except instead of steam escaping, it’s pain finding an outlet through the body.
But wait, isn’t that the same as suicidal behaviour?
Nope. Big difference. People who engage in NSSI usually don’t want to die. In fact, for many, self-injury is a way to avoid suicidal thoughts—it helps them feel something real, distract from emotional pain, or regain a sense of control. But, and here’s the crucial part, repeated self-harm can sometimes increase the risk of suicidal behaviour later. So while they’re not the same, they do exist in the same emotional neighbourhood.
Who’s most affected by this?
NSSI doesn’t discriminate, but certain groups are more at risk. Adolescents? They top the list. The teenage years can be a rollercoaster of emotions, and sometimes, when young people don’t have the right coping skills, they turn to self-injury. But adults aren’t immune either—it can happen at any stage of life. Other risk factors? A history of trauma, mental health struggles (depression, anxiety, borderline personality disorder), social isolation, or even just growing up in an environment where emotions weren’t openly expressed.
Why do people do it?
For some, it’s a way to feel something—anything—when they’re emotionally numb. For others, it’s about punishing themselves for perceived failures. Some use it to calm overwhelming emotions, like an internal storm that needs an external release. And yes, some might do it to communicate distress when they don’t have the words for it. Whatever the reason, it’s never “just a phase” or “attention-seeking.” It’s a sign that someone is struggling and needs support.
What does NSSI do to a person emotionally?
On the surface, it might seem like a quick fix, but the long-term effects? Not so great. It chips away at self-esteem, strains relationships, and can make daily life a constant battle. The guilt, secrecy, and shame that come with self-harm can make someone feel even worse. It’s a vicious cycle—one that often connects to deeper mental health challenges.
How can you tell if someone is self-harming?
It’s not always obvious, but there are clues. Long sleeves in hot weather, unexplained cuts or bruises, withdrawing from social interactions, or always having a “clumsy” excuse for injuries. Friends, family, and professionals can help by being observant, non-judgmental, and offering a safe space to talk.
So, what helps?
Good news: NSSI is treatable. Therapy plays a huge role—Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) are particularly effective. These approaches help people learn healthier ways to manage emotions and develop coping skills that don’t involve harm. Support from friends, family, and even online or in-person support groups can make a world of difference too.
Can it be prevented?
Yes, and it starts with emotional resilience. Teaching people—especially young ones—how to handle stress, express emotions, and seek help when needed can reduce the likelihood of self-harm. Finding healthier coping mechanisms (journaling, physical activity, creative outlets) can also help. The key? Making sure people know they’re not alone in their struggles.
The Bottom Line
NSSI isn’t about being “weak” or “attention-seeking.” It’s a sign of emotional pain that needs understanding, not judgment. If you or someone you know is struggling, the best thing to do is reach out. Because no one should have to go through this alone—and help is always within reach.